August 2011
1 post
Peeve: The phrase “rub off on”. As in, “I can tell by her cynicism that Frank is starting to rub off on her.”
Why? Because it sounds nasty.
September 2009
10 posts
“Sorry, we’re the assholes going to three…”
– Guy after entering at ground floor, after seeing my 9
Don't Jump
By far the most awkward thing you can do in an elevator is to jump, especially with a friend. There’s a story behind this. This past Sunday, I was riding in the Piano Row elevator at Emerson accompanied by Bryan and Kate, my fellow survivors. On the ninth floor, we awkwardly fought with elevator number one, trying it to go down when it was set on going up. After finally pressing the call button...
Conversation?
What about conversation inside? If it’s just you and a random person, do you say hello and make small talk or awkwardly play with your phone and ignore them until one of you gets off? If you’re getting into an elevator with a friend or group and there’s already a topic of conversation, there’s no need to stop talking. There’s nothing wrong with talking, but be aware that people will listen, no...
Decisive Moment
One of the most universally awkward moments associated with elevators happens when the doors are slowly closing. You know when you’re about to get onto an elevator but the door starts closing? You make eye contact with the person(s) inside and chances are they just want to let it close and move on. Do you run for it? Stand awkwardly and stare at someone inside as the door slowly closing? If you...
About the Awkward Elevator
The social atmosphere created by elevators is inherently weird. It can’t be changed, it can only be observed and acknowledged because no matter what, elevator rides will forever be the hearth of awkward situations.
In the material sense, an elevator “is vertical transport vehicle that efficiently moves people or goods between floors of a building” (WP). In the situational sense, elevators are...